Wednesday, February 20, 2008

There Does Need to be More Sex In Marriage, But...

This is a whole new version of thirty "meetings" in thirty days. A Florida pastor is set to challenge married couples in his church to have sex every day for thirty days and singles to not have sex at all for thirty days. Sort of turning the typical equation on its head...so to speak. His thought is that by prescribing sex for married couples and abstinance for singles, their relationships could be revolutionized.

This is a gimmick to be sure-not just a gimmick to convey a message to his congregation, but a gimmick that has succeeded in drawing national media attention. And, it's a dangerous prescription for abusive or patriarchical relationships. But, as always, sex sells. But here's the deal-while I hate the blend of commercialism and sensationalism with religion, he kinda sorta has a point. I see countless married couples who rarely, if ever, have sex. There are lots of reasons, and it's often a symptom of deeper intimacy issues, but for many, they have simply gotten out of the habit. In our culture, kids, jobs, volunteer work-a million things-take priority over couples taking care of their own relationship, and a symptom of that is less physical intimacy-and sex is important in marriage. It's not the only thing, but it is a thing.

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